phatcat

Yesterday when I got home I posted a blog called “Some People Really Suck” while I still remain totally annoyed that this happened at all….I decided to “walk out” my anger(went for a brisk walk)came home and read some of your wonderful and supportive comments and I just want to say THANK YOU…of course I know I am better than letting what some “OLD BAG” says get me down but man there are some days when you really don’t need one more thing added to the “pile”,am I right!?

Today I decided that I needed a fesh start and began my day with a 4 mile walk and I feel a whole lot better as a result and when I do come across this woman/or ANYONE  else who feels the need to comment on my physical appearance I will ask them (with a smile on my face) Why did you feel the need to say something like that to me? I mean honestly how can they respond…

Thank you all again I know I’ve come to the right place for suport in this BATTLE!

I decided to join up on this site a few weeks ago feeling really dejected and tired of whining to my husband(he’ll never “get”this whole food thing-his idea of “lowfat” is using margarine instead of butter-I don’t know either!!)Anyways, so I’m taking it day by day trying my best-talking with some really great supportive new friends and overall starting to feel just a little better abouth the whole new healthy lifestyle and starting to get a a handle on my feelings and daily struggles with food and then today…….WHAM……like a ton of bricks this woman remarks to one of my co-workers(while I am in earshot) how much weight I have put on and this was right when I came back from an afternoon walk…well to be frank I felt like I got kicked in the stomach and really felt like crying and started second guessing myself and all my efforts. I guess my point is….1)Why do people feel that this is kind of behaviour is ok and where do they get off commenting on other people’s physical appearance-I mean for crying out loud I KNOW I’VE GAINED WEIGHT-most people do know and don’t need strangers pointing it out to them.

2)And perhaps more importantly, Why is this bothering me so much or why am I letting it bother me so much especially since I know I am on the right track and have been listening all the great advice and kind words from my buddies?

I am sure I will feel better about this once I really think about it, I think I really needed to get it out…on the bright side I DIDN’T hit any Drive-thrus on my way home or dive into a bag of Doritos yet….the night is young!

Thanks for listening ……………. M

I don’t really have any news today just thinking about the real commitment it takes to do this and how I need to take it day by day and stop thinking in terms of …..”I want this FAT OFF RIGHT NOW…”It is really hard but for myself I have to think about each day and NOT put myself  into social situations(restaurants and parties)until I am much more comfortable-I know there are ways to get around this and it is all about adopting a “healthy life change” but I mean really when you are just starting out(albeit my hundredth new start)do you really want to go out with all your skinny minny friends/family and just have a “2 point” glass of wine and a salad without croutons/and of course dressing ON THE SIDE…while everyone else is eating something delicious followed by dessert…I say DON’T EVEN BOTHER for now…at least I am not… and same goes for buying clothes,I am going to wear what I have for now and save up for something I really love in a much smaller size!!

I have only been on this “buddy” system for less than a week and already I feel much better-knowing that others are having the same challenges as me but my big question for everyone is WHEN will I stop waking up every morning and my first thoughts being about my weight , in fact I think about it all day until it is time to go to bed(usually hungry)and then same thing the rest of the week….do I need to obsess this much to lose weight?Is it normal to feel this way because to be honest I would love to have just 1 day where I didn’t think about it at all-I mean even when I was a lot lighter I still felt fat…When,when,when will this STOP?

I just returned from a really quick trip to the States (I live about an hour and a bit from the border) and WOW you guys are so lucky to have all these fun “100 calorie” snacks and cool snack bars…I mean we have “some” stuff but you have way more than we do!! I know you can’t make a steady diet of these things but  I love to have something to snack on that won’t totally de-rail my efforts, I don’t know about you but I think everyone needs a “treat” now and again! I tried these new CHEX TURTLE BARS (2 pts on WW)-just awesome…my new PMS EMERGENCY snack!!

I purchased a good sturdy pedometer today and really want to increase my “daily steps” and use this tool to see tangible results. Something about being accountable works better for me..I can fool myself about a lot, but have learned that the numbers really don’t lie so if I do my steps everyday and weigh myself every week and count my daily “points” I think I am setting myself up for success….now finding the motivation everyday, well that’s another story but I’m sure gonna try!

I just discovered this community of support kind of by accident..I was/am just looking to record my thoughts and try and figure out where I am going wrong with my diet attempts.As I write this I’m an active(?)member of weight watchers and I really do believe it to be a good program HOWEVER, I re-joined in March and I have lost a “WHOOPING” ten pounds..which to some might seem alright but honestly I think I have been giving it a better effort than that and wonder what am I doing/not doing.I know I need to “step it up” exercise wise-I walk everyday(usually 45 min-1 hour)but something needs to click and I only want to do something I enjoy and can stick with for awhile.  Feeling a little sad and depressed today and I have so many thoughts swirling around I just really don’t know where to start-to make that change.I know I can do it but HOW is the big question.I don’t want to be so out of shape,I need to feel hot-I’ve only been married a few years and already don’t feel very “SEXY”.I want this to change and I really need some help!

I am really not sure how to go about this and not even sure if i am doing this post correctly but I’ve decided to try and give weight loss blogging a try-can’t hurt